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BOOMSHANKA!

SO ALL OF ASUDDEN i'M THE BAD ONE BECAUSE i'M TRYING TO SEEK HELP FOR mY pROBLEMS RATHER THAN IGNORING THEm WHILE oTHERs ARE IN DENIAL.

WELL TOO BAD - I AM A GREATER FORCE TO DEAL WITH.

I DON'T ASK ANYONE TO GO UP AGAINST ME TO PROVE THIS, I AM JUST SAYING THIS NOT AT A MATTER OF EGO BUT OF HOPEFUL POSITIVITY. AND WHO CAN DENY THAT IN THE 21ST CENTURY?

THINGS ROLL DIFFERENTLY AROUND HERE. AND THERE. AND EVERYWHERE.

HUMANS SEEK THEIR OWN SOLUTIONS DUE TO THE FACT GOVERNMENTS CAN'T HELP THEM - AND NEITHER CAN ANY OF THEIR DEPARTMENTS, AND NEITHER CAN ANYTHING THAT MONEY CAN BY.

THE ONLY CHANCE YOU HAVE IN LIFE IS KRISHNA.

SO FUCK OFF IF YOU WANT IT ANY OTHER WAY!  YOU CAN BEAT ME, BUT MY GOD IS GREATER THAN YOURS.  I WILL LIVE YEARS BEYOND YOU, REGARDLESS, SO TRY TO HURT ME NOW JUST GIVES ME AFEW MORE STORIES TO TELL.

I DON'T NEED YOUR TORMENT IN MY HOME.

GO TO HELL.  THEY NEED YOU THERE.

IF NOT - WALK OUT ON THE FUCKING STREET AND KHOCK ON A NEIGHBOURS DOOR - RUN.  THERE IS MORE THAN ENOUGH HELP AVAILABLE. YOU CAN PAY ME LATER. I KNOW WHAT I WANT.

OKAY - THAT'S IT - TONIGHT I'VE HAD ENOUGH AND I'M SPILLING MY GUTS HERE - IF THIS PROVES TO BE WRONG, AND I AM HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR THAT, WELL SO BE IT.

I AM SURE THAT THIS IS WHAT HAS BEEN BUGGING ME.

WITH HOCUS POCUS ASIDE, THE REALITY STILL LIES (IF YOU BELIEVE THE "STORIES" I TELL.....????) THAT THERE WAS SOMEONE SHITTING AND PISSING IN MY HOME, WHILE I WAS ASLEEP, AND I WOULD WAKE UP IN SOME REALLY BAD STATES, FEELING "INTERFERED WITH". OKAY - MAYBE I WAS SLEEP-POOPING? NO - THE POOS WEREN'T MINE - I'M VEGETARIAN AND A BIT OF A RESEARCHER SO I KNOW WHAT MY POOP LOOKS LIKE. AND MY DOGS' TOO - I PICK HERS UP ALL THE TIME! WE ARE NOT VERY SMELLY, THIS WAS FOUL, OBVIOUS MEAT EATER AND DRINKER. GROSS.

WELL - REGARDLESS OF THE PHYSICAL THINGS THAT HAPPENED HERE, I HAVE BEEN MENTALLY TORMENTED BY THIS, PARTICULARLY BECAUSE NOT A FUCKER IN SIGHT EVEN BELIEVES ME!

OR THEY ARE USING ME AS BAIT.

AMANDA COMES DOWN HARD ON THESE TYPE OF PEOPLE, AMANDA KNOWS A LOT OF DIFFERENT PEOPLE FROM MANY WALKS OF LIFE AND IS A WELL TRUSTED AND LIKEABLE PERSON.  I DON'T DO NOTHING TO NOONE, UNLESS THEY STRIKE THREE TIMES, THEN I WILL SAY "RUN", AND SEEYA LATER!

I DON'T WANT ANY SORT OF TROPHY FROM ANYONE ABOUT ANYTHING.  I JUST WANT TO LIVE THE LIFE THAT I CHOOSE WHERE I AM.  I DON'T BREAK THE LAW.  I'M A GOOD CITIZEN.

*CLEARS THROAT* 

SO..... IF YOU FUCK AND TORTURE YOUR CHILDREN NEAR ME, I WILL SPEAK UP FOR THEM IF THAT'S WHAT THEY WANT TO DO, AS I WILL SPEAK UP FOR ANY TRUTH IN MY LIVES. IF I HAVE TO SPEAK TO SOME PARTY THAT I DON'T LIKE - I WILL STILL DO IT.

AND IF YOU INTERFERE WITH ME I WILL NOT ALLOW THAT UNLESS YOU ARE GIVING ME SOME LOVE. I, LIKE EVERYONE ELSE ON THIS EVEN MORE LONELY PLANET, ONLY DESERVES LOVE AND COMPASSION, UNDERSTANDING AND KINDNESS, EVEN IF YOU THINK THOSE WORDS SOUND CORNY - IT IS NOT MY PROBLEM - IT IS YOURS.

I GET SCARED IN MY HOME THESE DAYS AND I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE.  PEOPLE SHOULDN'T HAVE TO LIVE LIKE THIS - NONE OF US CAN TRUST EACH OTHER, ALL OF US HATE THE OTHER, SUCH PEOPLE WANT TO STEAL, AND RAPE, AND MURDER, EVEN BRUTALLY.  THEY ABUSE ANIMALS (INCL HUMANS) AND THE ENVIRONMENT (INCLUDING OUR NEIGHBOURHOODS), AND EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN.

WAKE UP TO YOURSELF AUSTRALIA - YOU ARE BECOMING CRIME RIDDEN BECAUSE YOU ARE ALL A BUNCH OF SELFISH FUCKS LOOKING OUT FOR YOURSELVES WITH NO CONSIDERATION FOR OTHERS.

NEXT TIME I SEE YOUR "DO RANDOM ACTS OF KINDNESS" STICKERS, I BE VOMITTING ON IT.

i LOVE THE BLESSED WORDS OF THE KRISHNA'S MERCY  B L O G , EVERY DAY IT SINGS TO ME, UNLIKE MY OWN THAT JUST SITS HERE AND NOONE EVEN LOOKS AT IT, THE ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE COMPUTERS JUST LOOK ME UP AND ARE HOPING I'LL GET ON TO ONE OF THE PICK UP SIGHTS, ..... SIGH..... *COUGH*  I HAVEN'T CHANGED MY WAYS, JUST MY TACTICS

ldquo;Of all kinds of animal killing, the killing of cows is most vicious because the cow gives us all kinds of pleasure by supplying milk. Cow slaughter is an act of the grossest type of ignorance.rdquo; (Shrila Prabhupada, Bhagavad-gita, 14.16 Purport)

For those growing up in a tradition where meat eating is the norm, learning that other societies protect and sometimes even worship an animal like a cow seems a little strange. ldquo;Perhaps it is part of their tradition or just some sectarian belief. Like wearing different kinds of shirts, the different religions practiced are there to be accepted on faith or just inherited from the parents as a matter of obligation. I am this or I am that, but what lsquo;thatrsquo; actually means doesnrsquo;t really matter because all there is to lsquo;thatrsquo; is the acknowledgment that I am lsquo;thatrsquo; and nothing else.rdquo; Though the Vedic traditions may be followed for these reasons, each and every guideline is provided to fulfill a purpose. The purpose to cow protection is rather straightforward, for the same principles are followed in so many other areas of life. In addition, the cows are dear to Lord Krishna, the object of service in the discipline that gave us the concept of cow protection.

The mother produces milk for her child based on need. This wonderful feature of nature gives the mother her strong standing, her position as the ultimate caretaker of the newborn that just spent nine months developing within her womb. The fetus felt safe in the comfortable environment of the womb because it was away from harm and it depended completely on the mercy of the mother. The dependency flows both ways, as the mother produces the much needed nourishment for her newborn once it enters the world. If a mother didnrsquo;t naturally harbor this affection for her child, the child wouldnrsquo;t automatically be placed into her custody.

Now, just imagine if after being protected in this way the child or someone else comes and kills the mother. Would the person who protested against such a practice be considered an oddball? Would their pleas to save the innocent life of an important caregiver be considered some strange sectarian principle that violates the edicts of other religions? Of course this wouldn't be the case, but when the same scenario applies to the killing of innocent mother cows, logic and sound reason are thrown out the window in favor of the passionate desire to eat the flesh of the slaughtered animal.

Lest we think the comparison isnrsquo;t valid because a human mother is different from an animal mother, we already see that dogs and cats are protected. The dog is considered ldquo;manrsquo;s best friendrdquo; because it offers unconditional love. No matter how hard a day you have at the office or what else is troubling you in life, you just go up to your dog and pet it and feel satisfaction. The dog allows you to love it without impediment. The dog doesnrsquo;t ask for anything in return except for some food and the ability to use naturersquo;s restroom at the proper times. From a small amount of protection, the dog provides so much emotional satisfaction.

The cow actually provides just as much unconditional love, if not more. The cow produces products that can be sold for a profit, which can then be used to sustain life. Unlike the dog, the cow doesnrsquo;t even require love from the owner; just the ability to love its offspring. The cow only needs to graze on the field every now and then; otherwise itrsquo;s pretty easy to maintain. Even the stool and urine produced by the cow have antiseptic properties; something which canrsquo;t be explained by mundane science, for it defies all logic and reasoning.

If the unconditional love in the form of milk products and the ease of maintenance are present in the cow, why is it mercilessly slaughtered by the millions each year? Why is not the dog given the same treatment? Indeed, why is there outrage anytime there is cruelty to pets when other animals are treated much worse all the time? Why is it that those who do protect the cows and urge others to stop eating beef are seen as oddballs following a strange religion?

Obviously the only answer to these questions is ignorance. The sober person not only sees that cows need to be protected, they notice that the essence of individuality is present within all living beings. The ant, the owl, the cow, the dog, and the human being are the same in spiritual quality. Even amongst human beings, there is no difference between the infant and the fully matured adult capable of doing quantum physics.

ldquo;The humble sage, by virtue of true knowledge, sees with equal vision a learned and gentle brahmana, a cow, an elephant, a dog and a dog-eater [outcaste] .rdquo; (Lord Krishna, Bhagavad-gita, 5.18)

The outward behavior and appearance may vary across species, but this doesnrsquo;t mean that the spark of life has changed. The learned man views all living beings as equal, but their treatment is not necessarily altered. For instance, I may know that a tiger is a spirit soul just like me, but this doesnrsquo;t mean that I will go up to the tiger and pet it. Just because I am aware of the equality of living beings doesnrsquo;t mean that others are as well.

But even if the tiger is unaware of the presence of spirit throughout nature, this doesnrsquo;t mean that the wise should unnecessarily kill them. Nonviolence towards animals seems like a strange principle in many parts of the world, but in certain areas the opposite is deemed the odd behavior. If you grow up in surroundings where animals arenrsquo;t killed, you will think that those who do eat animal flesh are the weird ones. In this sense both traditions can be taken as norms, as being legitimate. If both traditions already exist, why not make an honest assessment as to which one is more beneficial in the long run?

The proponents of bhakti-yoga say that nonviolence towards animals is a prerequisite for legitimate worship of God to commence. Bhakti is love and yoga is connecting the soul with the higher being, the person most of the world refers to as God. Bhakti-yoga is the religion of love and in order for that love to flow best, the mind must be sober. If I understand who I am worshiping and what their qualities are, I am more apt to be drawn to those features and form an attachment. If I am preoccupied by intoxication and killing innocent animals to eat their flesh, how sober can my mind really be?

The person connected with is also the Lord of all creatures; He is the original father. Therefore if I am to think of Him at all times, dedicate my life to His service, a natural byproduct of that engagement will be respect for everything He has created. The innocent cow that produces milk is obviously someone elsersquo;s child. Therefore showing respect to the cow means showing respect to its parents. If we expand out the scope of lineage even further, we see that no living being can claim to have been created through their own effort. In the Vedic tradition, Lord Brahma is considered the self-create, but even he has a father in Vishnu, the Supreme Lord.

Question: How will loving Godrsquo;s creatures help me serve God?

Loving the creatures that God created serves as the prerequisite for pure bhakti, but it is not the final word. To show respect for other life forms is a given, for we already apply this deference to other human beings and to pets. In this sense we donrsquo;t consider any person noteworthy for not going around killing other human beings. We donrsquo;t go up to someone and say, ldquo;Hey, yoursquo;re a great person. You donrsquo;t kill your cat and dog. You are someone I want to model my behavior after.rdquo; Rather, the respect given to life forms is expected, something not considered noteworthy.

The sobriety of mind is the key benefit resulting from the protection of innocent life. The sober mind can better concentrate on the forms, qualities and pastimes of the Supreme Lord. These aspects are non-different from Him and they are meant for the pleasure of the yogis looking to connect with Him in love. This is the special mercy of the Supreme Lord that is passed on in great abundance in the Vedic scriptures, the crown jewel of which is the Shrimad Bhagavatam.

In one sense the Supreme Lord hasnrsquo;t given us enough of His pastimes. The original poem, arguably the first book ever composed, is the Ramayana, which deals with the life and pastimes of Vishnursquo;s avatara of Lord Rama. The original Ramayana is quite lengthy according to standard estimation, but to those desiring to connect with God on a regular basis, there can never be enough verses describing the wonderful activities of the Supreme Lord and His spiritual forms which descend to earth to delight the saintly class of men. Therefore, people who follow in the disciplic succession of bhakti write their own poems, books and commentaries so that they can create even more points of interaction with their beloved Lord. The famous Ramacharitamanasa of Goswami Tulsidas serves as an example. The author took a different version of the telling of Ramarsquo;s life story so that his mind could have even more distinct pastimes to concentrate on. In the beginning of this work, the wonderful poet explains that there are actually millions of verses to describe Rama and His divine acts, but that he is only going to share a few that are known to please himself and also those interested in hearing about Rama.

With sobriety comes the ability to chant the holy names with full attention. Recite the sacred formula of, ldquo;Hare Krishna Hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna, Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama, Rama Rama, Hare Harerdquo;, and try to hear the sound vibrations as you chant. Without any other effort, the hearing alone will bring Godrsquo;s presence. With the personal influence of the Supreme Spirit resting comfortably within the consciousness, pious behavior will naturally follow. The restrictions on sinful activity that were previously followed with reluctance will be cast aside as being unimportant. Adherence to nonviolence will be as routine as getting up in the morning and taking a shower. Avoiding intoxication will be like avoiding foods that you donrsquo;t like; a restriction you donrsquo;t have to think about. The sweetheart loving the entire creation will cherish their bhakti-yoga even more, for through service to God one learns how to properly serve man and the rest of the creation.

I LOVE KRISHNA, AND CHANTING THE NAMES OF THE LORD AND THE NAMES OF ANY AND ALL OF THE SAINTS AND HOLY EVERYTHING JUST EVERYTHING!  WHEN I COME ACCROSS A PROBLEM, I JUST HAVE TO REMEMBER TO CHANT HARE KRISHNA HARE KRISHNA KRISHNA KRISHNA HARE HARE HARE RAMA HARE RAMA RAMA RAMA HARE HARE ...................WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..................... 

HELLO ALL

HOW ARE WE TODAY?

HERE I AM OKAY.  AND IF NOT I WOULDN'T TELL YOU ANYWAY.

IF I KEEP MY PAIN TO MYSELF IT'S BECAUSE IT HURTS LESS THAT WAY.

PIC FROM THE MOVIE "BROTHER ORCHID"

I DON'T WANT TO DESCRIBE ALL THE SHIT THAT GOES ON IN MY MIND, ESPECIALLY TO PEOPLE THAT CAN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT!

THERE HAS BEEN A LONG AMOUNT OF TIME I HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO ACCESS MY BLOG, AND I'VE BEEN TOO PRE-OCCUPIED AT THE TIMES I COULD, TO BE ABLE TO POST ANYTHING.... SO HERE IT IS, AND IT AIN'T THAT GREAT, NO LITERARY GENIUS SKILLS HERE TODAY.  SORRY.

I HAVE TOO MUCH RELIANCE ON THE INTERNET THINKING THAT IF I PUT MY THOUGHTS ON HERE, EVERYONE WILL KNOW AND BE ABLE TO ACT ACCORDINGLY.  BUT IT'S NOT TRUE - AND IF IT WAS THERE WOULD BE A PILE OF PEOPLE THAT SHOW NO COMPASSION FOR ANYONE WITH THE STORIES I HAVE HEARD AND WROTE ON THIS INTERNET SERVICE.

MY DOG WAS TELLING ME THE OTHER DAY THAT ANIMALS HATE FACEBOOK.  BECAUSE THEIR CARERS SPEND MORE TIME ON THAT THAN PLAYING WITH THEIR PETS.  I HEARD ONE PERSON KILLED A KITTEN THAT GOT IN THE WAY OF SOME CORDS OR SOMETHING, (IT'S NOT WORD THAT CAN BE COUNTED ON AS 100% TRUE) HOW CAN PEOPLE DO THAT?  I LIKE IT WHEN MY SERVICE GOES OFF AND I GET TO SPEND TIME WITH MY NON NET RESPONSIBILITIES AND ENJOYMENTS.

"POWER LINES GET IN OUR WAY!"

THIS YEAR, FOR MY SPIRITUAL DUTIES AT CHRISTMAS, I HAVE DECIDED TO START A NINE DAY ROSARY NOVENA, AND IT STARTED 9 DAYS BEFORE CHRIZNIT, WHICH WAS JUST A COINCIDENCE, BUT A GOOD ONE AT THAT.  WATCH OUT FOR WHAT I WISH FOR AS IT MAY INCLUDE YOU.

THIS YEAR, I HATE IT MORE THAN EVER THAT THE HOLIDAY SEASON IS AMOUNTING TO BIG POLLUTIONS ON OUR BEAUTIFUL PLANET (THE EARTH THAT DOESN'T NEED US).  IT'S HARD TO GET AROUND IT.

ONCE BEFORE I WOULD'VE SPILLED MY GUTS WITH ALL OF THESE AMAZING REVELATIONS IN MY OWN LIFE BUT NOW I SEE NO POINT IN THAT, SO I AM KEEPING IT ALL TO MYSELF.  I'VE BEGUN TO VALUE MY OWN WORDS AND TIME! :O

A LOT OF PEOPLE SAY I RAVE ON TALKING TOO MUCH, BUT I ALWAYS FEEL I CAN'T GET A WORD IN EDGEWISE A LOT OF THE TIME WHEN I SEE FRIENDS.

LOOKING AT MYSELF MORE THAN LOOKING AT YOU OR ANYONE ELSE.

I DON'T HAVE MANY F2F FRIENDS ANYMORE.  ITS NOT LIKE IT USED TO BE.  I DON'T LIKE THAT EITHER.  I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE SOMEONE TO CONFIDE IN BUT I GUESS THIS IS NOT A VERY GOOD PLACE TO BE SAYING SO.

I KNOW THEY'VE SENT ME FAKES - PEOPLE TO SUSS MY NOTIONS OUT - BUT I DON'T CARE ANYMORE.  ONCE I WOULD'VE CRIED ABOUT IT, NOW DAYS I'D GIVE THEM THE BIRD FINGER IF I COULD PROVE THEY WERE WATCHING ME.  I ALWAYS FEEL WATCHED, AND I CAN HEAR THE MICROPHONES.  DO ANY OF YOU BELIEVE THIS? MICROPHONES MOSTLY ALWAYS HAVE FEEDBACK AND YOU CAN HEAR THAT IF YOU LISTEN CAREFULLY.

I'M SICK OF HAVING TO LOOK FOR THINGS IN MY HOUSE JUST TO PROVE THEY ARE NOT THERE AND STOLEN BY SOME TRASHY PERSON.  STEALING OFF SOMEONE LIKE ME, YOU WILL LEARN TO REGRET IT, THIS IS NOT A THREAT, BUT MERELY A STATEMENT ABOUT HOW I CAN GET OTHERS TO BE EMOTIONALLY STIRRED UP.  MY WHINGING CARRIES ACCROSS THE SEAS.

TAKE IT ALL

THE WORLD REALLY IS A SMALL PLACE, SO THE THINGS WE HAVE TO DO TO SAVE IT ARE SMALL THINGS TOO - THEY MAY SEEM BIG, BUT THEY AREN'T.  THERE WAS A FACEBOOK GROUP WHERE MEMBERS WERE ONLY ALLOWED TO SIGN UP IF THEY PICKED UP THREE PIECES OF TRASH PER DAY.  I BARELY SEE THREE PIECES OF TRASH PER WEEK, EXCEPT FOR NORMAL HOUSEY STUFF.... SO I DIDN'T WANT TO SPOIL THE ESSENCE OF THE GROUP BY JOINING UP.

I CAN BE A BITCH AND A SWEETHEART ON FACEBOOK.  I'M ALWAYS CRAPPING ON ABOUT ANIMALS RIGHTS AND KRISHNA.  BUT THAT'S ME - THAT IS WHAT I AM ACTUALLY INTERESTED IN.  LIKE IT OR LEAVE.  LIKE IT AND COME MY WAY....  I WISH I HAD MORE GUTS TO POST LOVE STUFF TO THAT SPECIAL GUY, BUT RECENTLY I HAVE HAD NO WORDS THAT SEEM ENOUGH FOR HIM.  HE APPEARS TO IGNORE ME BUT I KNOW THAT MUSTN'T BE THE WAY THAT IT REALLY IS.  I'M NOT ONE TO POKE AROUND IN PEOPLE'S NET BUSINESS, STALK ANYONE, OR ANNOY PEOPLE WITH REPETITIVE SUGGESTIONS - SO I SIT HERE, CROSSING MY FINGERS AND MY LEGS, WAITING.... IT'S ANOTHER CHRIZNIT - AND THIS YEAR? IT SEEMS BEING UNSATISFIED AT THIS TIME REALLY DOES CAST A PALL ON THE REST OF THE COMING YEAR'S THOUGHTS ABOUT THE HOLIDAY TIME :/  IT'S NICE TO BE WITH FAMILY AND A FEW MATES, BUT REALLY IT IS NOT WHAT I'D BE DOING IF I HAD A BETTER CHOICE.

SEEYA LATERZ WHEN YA LEGZ ARE STRAIGHTER....

BEAUTIFUL ESSENTIAL OILS - ESSPECIALLY EXOTIC ONES

MOST FRUITS

COCONUT

"REAL" YOGHURT

PARMESAN CHEESE

ERASERS

FEATHERS

HELLO KITTY

FUNNY JOKES

THINGS THAT MAKE ME LAUGH

SCISSORS

PENS PENCILS STATIONERY

LETTERS

LETTER SETS

STAMPS

GRASS

ROSES

GARDENING

SEEDS

GROWING

FLOWERS EVERYWHERE

LOVE HEARTS ALL OVER THINGS

BLUE

STARS

RAINBOWS

KRISHNA

MINI PLUSH TOYS

MY ONE HUGE PLUSH TOY WHICH IS A FROG

MY BEDROOM

MY HOME

MY BACK YARD

A LOT OF ACQUAINTENCES THAT PROLLY DON'T KNOW THAT

OF COURSE MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY

TYPING

WRITING

CALLIGRAPHY

DRAWING

PAINTING

SEWING

SCRAPBOOKING

DOODLING

DIARY WRITING

STICKERS

DRAGONS

PAPERCLIPS

CDS

IDM

ADELAIDE 90S TECHNO AND SAME ARTISTS SINCE

DETROIT MUSIC AND HUMOUR

USA INTERNET RADIO STATIONS

MY T HUB

MY T HUB INTERNET RADIO

EVERYTHING ON MY T HUB

TALKING ON THE PHONE

PICTURE MESSAGES

FACEBOOK

BIGBLOG

ME

MY HAIR

SOME OF MY CLOTHES

MY AMBITIONS

MY WAY OF DECIDING THINGS

PANDAS

KOALAS

ELEPHANTS

SKINKS

LABRADORS

DOGS, KITTIES ALL HOMEY PETS

ALL FARM ANIMALS

ALL JUNGLE ANIMALS

FISH

BIRDS ALL BIRDS LOVE LOVE SPECIAL LOVE TO ALL BIRDS

MY BITCH SCRUBBY

THE WAYS OF MY COMPADRHES

PINK ROSES

WHITE CARNATIONS

POT PLANTS

BEAUTIFUL POTTERY

CHINA - THE COUNTRY

CHINA - BONE CHINA DINNERWARE

STRAWS

SWIZZLE STICKS

BUYING LOTS OF THINGS FOR THE KITCHEN AND MY OWN DUTIES AS A HOUSIE

MAKING INSPIRED THINGS

HAVING THE MADE INSPIRED THINGS IN WORKING ORDER INMY HOME

MY ART

OTHER PEOPLE'S ART

BEING AUTHORATITIVE

BEING ASKED FOR ADVICE

BEING COLOURFUL WITH SPEECH AND MATERIAL ITEMS

HAVING LOTS OF THINGS AROUND ME TO NOT GET BORED

FREE WHATEVER

VEGETARIANISM

HEALTHY HAPPY BEINGS INCL ANIMALS AND HUMANS AND PLANTS AND EARTH

DREAMS

REPEATING MYSELF

MY REFLEXES

MY MEMORIES

HALLOWEEN

CHRISTMAS

EASTER

AUSTRALIA DAY

USA INDEPENDANCE DAY

ALL OF THE INDIAN HINDU/HARE KRISHNA SPIRITUAL OBSERVANCE HOLIDAYS

SUNSHINE

RAIN

OVERCAST SKIES BEHIND LOTS OF EUCALYPTS

TAKING PHOTOS

KICKING PUNCHING STRETCHING

SIT UPS WHEN I CAN CONVINCE MYSELF TO

SLEEPING AS LONG AS I WANT TO

BEING ON TIME

THE WIN:WIN SITUATION

MATES, COBBERS AND THE AUSTRALIAN WAY

KEVIN ELEVEN AND SHOULD'VE STAYED SINCE SEVEN

COMPLAINING

POKING FUN AT IDIOTS

BEING RELAXED

BEING BEYOND THE CONCERN OF FASHION

BEING A FAIR PERSON

BEING ABLE TO COOK

BUT NOT ALWAYS COOKING LOL

POKING FUN IN A LOVING MANNER

BOOKS

DICTIONARY

THESAURUS

TAROT CARDS

NOKIAS

SABIAN SYMBOLS

ASTROLOGY

ESTEE LAUDER

BEYONCE

DIOR

ECO STUFF

SUCCESS STORIES

FRIENDSHIP BOOKS

GOSSIP

ROMANCE

LADYBUGS

EGYPT

IRELAND

EVERYTHING CLOURED OR PATTERNED INSTEAD OF JUST STANDARD

PERSONALISATION

KINDNESS

THOUGHTFULNESS

POST

MAIL

MALES

...

 YES IT'S THAT TIME OF THE YEAR WHERE MY BIRTHDAY MONTHIS ENDING AND FUCKAROO HAVE I FELT SOME TYPE OF WEIGHT ON MY WHOULDERS.  I'VE HAD PLANETS IN AND OUT OF THE CENTRE OF MY HAND, WOWZERS. CERTAINLY IS INTENSE.

BUT ANYWAY, I'VE HAD SO MANY MANY PEOPLE JUST ABSOLUTELY BITCHING AT ME LATELY, EXCEPT THOSE WHO ARE LIKE WE, TOUGHENING THE FUCK UP FOR THESE HORRID TIMES, WHERE EVERYONE IS BITCHY,,,, GO BACK TO THE START OF THIS SENTENCE.  SO YOU GET TO SEE WHO THE COOL ONES ARE

IT IS NOT THAT IT JUST MIGHT HAPPEN - IT IS THAT IST IS HAPPENING, AND HAS HAPPENED FOR A WHILE NOW - THIS THING CALLED BLISS IN THE 21ST CENTURY.

ENCOURAGEMENT COMES, BUT HELP DOESN'T

I'M REALLY TRYING HARD NOW AND THEN THAT EFFECTS ME TRYING HARD ON OTHER ASPECTS OF MY LIFE, SO I'VE DEVELOPED TWO SETS OF HANDS TO DEAL WITHMORE THINGS AT ONCE, AND AM PERFECTING THE USE OF RIGHT AND LEFT HANDS, AND USE OF THE FEET TO. I'M A MONKEY!

PARANOIA HAS OVER COME MY LIFE.  I JUST HAVE TO IGNORE EVERYTHING.  AND THEN TAKE IT AS IT COMES WHEN IT HAPPENS.  THIS HURTS ME TO SAY IT, IS IT LIKE A PUBLIC PURGE FOR MYSELF? WHO CARES AND WHO DOESN'T - WHY SHOULD I NOT TELL THE WAY I SEE THINGS TO THE PUBLIC? WHY SHOULD IT REMAIN A MYSTERY AND INSTEAD I JUST HAVE A BLOG ABOUT PORN, ENVIRO AND ARTS/CRAFTING?

I FEEL LIKE I AM WASTED IN SOCIETY THESE DAYS - IN TWO WAYS - NOONE IS WILLING TO SEE ME INTO FULL REHABILITATION TO THEN SEE WHAT I CAN PERFORM AFTER THAT TIME, WHICH I KNOW IS GOING TO BE HUGE. EVERY TIME I SEE A NEW WORKER OF SOME KIND, I CAN OUT DO THEM IN THEIR JOBS EXCEPT THOSE THAT HAVE VIRTUAL ALPHABETS AFTER THEIR NAMES, LIKE MY DAD DID. (SOME OF THEM YOU PAY TO HAVE!  LIKE I HAVE NO RIGHT TO PUT FGAA BEHIND MY NAME BECAUSE I AM NOW NOT IN THE TRADE AND HAVE NOT KEPT MY SUBSCRIPTION UP SINCE 1995 !!)

IT HAS BEEN VERY HARD TO POST ON BIGBLOG, SO I WILL TRY THIS SMALLER PAGE NOW, AND SEE HOW IT GOES, MAYBE DO THEM IN SERIES OF THIS SIZE OR WHATEVERTHEMFILIKE

many choices - ha ha ha

ha ha ha

ha ha ha

ha ha ha

change for the better

success and wishes granted

face and online dealings difficult, work to be done

Adobe fresh

will achieve Chitraguptra goal

not gaol

$econd chance

Love and Perfect Relationship from My own point of view

wish fulfilled in a way of My Ancestors ha ha

ha ha ha

ha ha ha

ha ha ha

bloody hell

new friends

new alliances (are you reading this?)

emotions of mine reflect future partners but because of society we are blocked from seeing each other what a mutha fucking mess it all is from my point of view i mean shit really

wants to meet, not necessarily the right one, but could be, is a little bit scared of me or what will come from that during that or because of that.

MONEY AND PERQS - CHEDDAR

*** *** ***

A TRIP

NOW

May change things for others also

A woman screws me over and I love her.  she takes advantage of me.

This person who is interfering, will be found out and persecuted. :) 

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

A NEW HOPE FROM A LOVING MEMORY

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Talking time is over, get real or get out.

If you r k i n d a n d c o n c e r NESS

I will recieve fair advice about it from outside of myself, and yourself.

ARE YOU WORKING UNLEASHTHEDRAGON.BIGBLOG.COM.AU ?

OKAY SO YOU'VE STILL GOT THAT TWITCH, WELL IF I CAN PUT UP WITH IT IN HUMANS, I CAN PUT UP WITH IT IN YOU, OH BIGBLOUSEBLOG

i WILL PUT OUT A ZINE SOON

INTRO-DE-DUCTION-{{{{{{{Hello dear folk of the www and beyond.... hope you are well !!!  dont get any sickness or bugs I may frighten you... viruses, ya know it? }}}}}}}

My whinge for tonight...

I think it is interesting about how the big ldquo;Crdquo; gets so much fundraising put behind it, but the people in other types of medical dire straits are hardly provided for at all. 

Cystic Fibrosis and Temporal Lobe Epilepsy are two of those that are totally overlooked in the way of public charity.  From my perspective, I canrsquo;t help a charity to raise funds for myself when I canrsquo;t even properly function in my life and my house some of the time (like most of it - ??) .  So someone else has to start the charity for me and my fellow TLE sufferers or with any other hidden illnesses.   Whether they are hidden because they are just in the mind, or hidden because the sufferer is continuously in hospital; None of Us can make a massive effort and I think this is justifiable on their and my part

(sometimes?)

(do the sick need help even when not sick?)

(would preventative medicine work if it were a concentrated effort?)

(are we all not-inclined to these things OR unable?)

Our major public hospitals all look really nice and swanky in certain wards, and then others have not been touched for a very long time.  It defeats me every time I go there to visit someone, too, apart from being there myself.   

It brings back the ldquo;noone careshellip;.rdquo; Attitude.

So we get a shitty deal in the hospital and there is very little support as an outpatient, too!   I always think about how a lot of the anti-cancer charities; well people can support whoever they like, but they have so many people behind it and they almost totally ignore other charities or testing for anything else to gain a cure, all of the tests are for cancer of the different types. 

Maybe Irsquo;m deluded, but hey, thatrsquo;s actually a part of my illness, so I canrsquo;t help it unless I had more help.  Regardless of the money I earned before I was sick, I havenrsquo;t been a wage earner for a long time now, and it really does break the bank.  So itrsquo;s unreasonable for me to pay massive doctor, psychologist, psychiatrist, specialists, massage therapists etchellip; I have to get medicare, or go without something to afford it. 

We are so lucky in Australia to have medicare!

Yes, I do think there are lots of different kinds of help out there, and I think thatrsquo;s great.  Helping is the thing to do.  The more you help people, the better society becomes as an automatic response. This can be proven logically.  

Wouldnrsquo;t it be great if ALL the spring water and fizzy drink bottles had coloured caps according to the charity they were donating to from proceeds of the sale, like Neverfail spring water does on some of its mineral water and spring water bottles in regard to the Breastie Cancer?  

Let alone all the other ways of charity for hospitals, facilities, caring and solving illnesses.

I donrsquo;t want my illness for my whole life like I am told I will have.   If they had a solution for that, I wouldnrsquo;t have to take a handful of pills every night and become a social outcast, I could live my life and enjoy freedom againhellip;

In 1994 I was given a mobile phone.  It was one of the initial smaller phones, and it had two batteries that needed to be taken on and off.  It was about 25cmx6cmx(whatever battery I had on it contributed to the width, there was a small flat one and a larger one that was double the size.

It saved 20 numbers, but I couldn't attach names or tags to the numbers.  Often in the weeks after a big night out, I'd think WHOSE NUMBER IS THIS?

I can't remember what model the phone was, but my friend who is a foneperson said what it was and I've forgotten..... It's all so long ago!

I enjoyed having that phone, but things crept in to my life as a result of it and I will tell you a little bit about that.

One thing - I ALWAYS had my phone on, especially on the weekend because my mates would call me to go out.  It meant - I could get called in to work if the alarm went off which it did once on a corker Friday night out in the clubs.

A good thing was when I was at a Boatshed rave, a dude started having a fit of some sort and I was able to call the ambulance straight away.  There was noone at this party "NON OFF TAP", so nobody could drive him, and there was a public phone about 15 minutes walk away.  And the actual hospital itself was only about that far away too!

Coming home from a club one early morning-night, we saw a fence on fire, and were able to call the fire emergency which saved burning their house down.

As a person that likes to adventure to new places, it's always good to travel with a mobile to be able to call the RAA, a Family member, or Friend if something goes wrong.  It has saved my arse like that many times.

Even when I am meant to be meeting people, I can recall going in to town on the bus to meet someone and they didn't show up!  Calling them at home on a pay phone was usually very ineffective.

When I didn't want calls... I'd unplug the phone at the wall.  These days everyone leaves texts or frikkin answering machine messages, and they can be persistent.  But don't worry about that - I can be MORE persistent! Hence my abillity to be able to get first caller through with heaps of radio station giveaways - I've done it all my life (well, not lately) even when I was a youngster to get a prize from the morning Video Hits shows in my youth.

I have some people that give me their numbers and when I call or text (even with my name mentioned) they totally ignore me and I never actually ever get to speak to them, and I think what is the point in giving me their number.  At least if they didn't want me to call they could give me the number of the piss off line or say it themselves. 

I notice with phones people aren't that brave.  They like to hide in a false anonymity which I shouldn't say is total bullshit because of the owner of this site.

Back in the day, younger people thought they were hot shit if they had a mobile phone.  I lent it to a friend to recieve some important calls and he sat in a cafe makin calls all afternoon, to "look cool".  I was not so happy paying the bill.  And I've never like people that toss off like that.  You use what you have and don't bother other people about letting them lend you anything.  It is not cool to pretend to other people you have and use the latest technology, even now.  its just a practical thing, not a snob thing to me!  I always find it funny when people don't know even half of what is on their phones or how to use them.  But with me, and my activities on the unit, that is nothing to do with calls, more and more becomes used by the day as I find out how.  There is so much in these lil social blankets now days! 

I still think land lines rock.  For so many reasons you may not think so, but how would you know if you didn't have one?  I am interested to know what coverage there would be available on land lines, if the moblie network goes down? and if the power is out?

Okay - so now that you've perhaps read the above I will tell you about the namesake of the story "banana brickette".  One of my Christmas Presents from a friend for Chriz 1994 was a see-thru plastic mock phone in lime green and it had little sparkly red green blue lights inside as I talked in to it and pressed various buttons.  So we used to drive along in the car saying "banana banana banana" in to the phone so it looked like we were having a conversation on a freaky new mobile!

At that stage in the game play, there was HEAPS of snobbery - people were rude about all sorts of aspects of it, whether they had one or not.

What I think about one thing now that was an issue for discussion back then - TAKING CALLS WHEN YOU ARE MEETING WITH SOMEONE FOR A DATE/LUNCH/DINNER/APPOINTMENT.

NO IT IS NOT ALRIGHT FOR YOUR PHONE TO GO OFF AT THE DOCTORS OR IN THE HOSPITALS - TURN THEM OFF WHERE THEY SAY SO AND DON'T IGNORE THE SIGNS.

According to "Manners" it shows a distinct disinterested in one's chosen company, to take calls while with a friend.  It is rude to talk to another friend while someone in front of you has made the time to spend with you.  IF you must take a call, tell them you will call back later, or ask your friend if they mind.  I MIND.  I think most people do it because they want some sort of reassuarce from it.  RUDE RUDE RUDE.

Don't have your mobile on at work.  Your clients are worth more than your friends when you are being paid for that.  And don't call your friends up on company phones in company time and then ignore customers, or perhaps not give them as much time as you could to get an extra sale, or give them more information about something that could be a future sale for the company you work for.

Plesae, Drivers that use their phones - put it on the bloody loudspeaker, turn it up loud and close the windows!  You risk other people's lives or their nice cars just for your carelessness.

Don't call me on a private number.  It's likely I will not answer.  And if you do ring on a private number, at least leave a message so I can call you back.  There shouldn't be even such a facility on the phone to hide one's number - fair go with all!

Prank callers - I love it, I do it, some laugh, some could kill me, but in all of it don't over harass a person.  let it be fun, and don't make yourself seem like a psycho in too many ways.  I smsed a guy 5 times in 6 months and he said I was harassing him!  So if someone says "don't do" it, DON'T, because it then can become a legal issue, and the police may be involved.  Also, don't try to trump your ex-gf, bff or bf by reporting them to the cops, unless it really is serious and there are grounds, if it's just some texts, they don't want to know, it wastes their time.

I guess the modern technology has made us all in to (some of us) walking, talking, info-finding, searching, photo-taking, social-networking... "people" with a bill to pay for it that has been one of the greater costs for families and singles since it's time began.  And more wires and satdishes looking ugly in our skies....

Before that we were just people with a pile of notes for phone messages other people had written down for us.... there were more trees

And before that.... I wasn't even born.... but there was a time, long, long ago, when phones didn't even exist, and the best they could do is tie two cans together with some nice string... stand apart... "Can you hear me?"

hello morning time at 11.46am. 

Breakfast was Lunch, and also in Liquid form.

Motivation came slow, I thought it was the second Sunday running.... as in I knew yesterday had been one too.   When is Groundhog Day going to stop?  ( I want to stop hearing the answer "SameShitDifferentDay" )

I knew I had things to do, and very little energy to do them.  As usual, noone helps and I've come to understand why that is.  noone wants to help you unless it's helping them, too.  and even then...? it's just the way humans prioritise things, and it may not even be conscious.  So I can't BLAME anyone for that like I had been doing for a very long time, it's pointless.  I just have to do the best for ME then, and don't hand out energy for nothing.

white light energy worx best rather than nothing

People can give Me the strangest looks at times.  

They are lucky that I hardly ever speak unless spoken to.  Sometimes I want to hit people over the head with a 40kg dumbell.  Other times I want to grab them and drag them away into Wonderland with Me... it's just whether they are willing, there is nothing you have to eat to get smaller and drink to get larger lol

I got some very bizarre and lovely things today.  A large Owl statue from Bunnings.  I'm going to fill it with concrete, through it's resealable hole in the bottom, and use it as a bookend to my Better Homes and Gardens magazines and Project Books.  Also I have My Acclaim Mags in this spot, too - it's what I call My Birdie Bed, where I can lounge at whatever time and look out on to My Backyard to see the birds always there... and at night other things come out to play... But - anywayz, I like to be able to pick up a magazine sometimes and that is just the place in My House for now.

For some of the driving time today (traffic was heavy) I listened to Fresh 92.7 FM - some stomping dance tunes and then when I didn't mind concentrating a little more (lol) I was enthralled by Srila Prapuphada's CD Japa from ISKCON.  It has two tracks on it and I like the first the most - ooooooooohhhhhhhh it moves me!!!!  And I notice it is how to get others to freak out and drive better in heavy traffic also

In Bunnings it was like there were several people after the same thing I was and that they were going to jump on Me when I found it, but they moved along.  Weird vibes.  Something I have learnt to not worry about even giving this much time to it, because these things are usually nothing and other people's deal nothing with me, and I can deal with whatever comes My way in most circumstances.  I think that so many computer/fone lovers, robots and humans alike forget about the Power Of the Supernatural, God and all the Forces everywhitchway....

I've got My Mum and My Friend some nice presents for Their Upcoming Birthdays.   Trying to take advantage of EOFY Sales.  There's lots to be had!  Mum's going to get some statues, come cookware and pretty cups.  My friend may read this so I will not say what SHe is getting.  Mum doesn't know how the internet works so we won't have to worry about Her reading this.  If you sent her a link she may be able to, but then She takes her time reading and you could be wasting valuable time in her day!

The other day I was in Smiggle and oooh oooh oohttt! there were even things out for 50cents or $1.  So there's something for everyone there!  I think I will go back there and maybe in to Doodling, too!  I love that shop and they have awesome Environmental/Political policies, which it would be good if Smiggle did too, or if they were already, that they advertised this!

I'll be off to Mecca before June 30 2011 - JJ -  

"Officeworks"

- that's what I call it because I have to hold My breath and pray everytime I even drive past it.   

I've been trying to ascertain where Mecca is from My house, because I use a lot of floor blankets here and they all seem to end up in the same direction after a while, unless I straighten them.  What is holy to one is bad design to another.  Shame, but fact.  It doesn't have to be like that though!!

I'm realigning a lot of things atm in My House, and it has been trippy for My serious mind.  I feel like when I laugh I can't control Myself.  It is a very serious time on Earth and I guess despite some people thinking that I am stoopid, I'm more than likely NOT!

 "And this double o - what does it mean?"

well it's not "ou" as in douche.

"This douche?"

you know it? douche bag - where it goes up the vagina and swooooooshes it all around and sucks it out?

"Oh no.  I do not know this - I am a virgin.  No - oops, I was a virgin when I got married. No - I'm sorry, I've fucked 742 girls, some men and never even heard of it"

Yeah, I know.

Okay well there is not much I DO say that ANYONE really wants to hear when it all comes down to it, they feel insulted, and embarassed, ashamed, guilty.  Well - that's your fault and your own feelings - not mine, and it's not the way I feel about the things I say and write at all.

I go to many cultural shops for produce, other than regular supermarkets.  I started doing this back in 1989, maybe even before then.  I still get treated like the outsider, yet these people have come here to where I have lived this time, and never recognise me or smile.  I do have some that are nice to me, but most won't even look me straight in the eye.  It really fucks me off. 

And even more so because when I talk to God,

God says it fucks God off, too. 

DISCRIMINATION is everywhere. 

It's become a reverse racist world

AND STILL

a racist world too. 

You can all go and fight as much as you fucking well please while I go on drinking coconuts, smelling Krishna's inscence, dancing and worshipping My Own Deities as much as I please, also doing whatever else I please, and for Me that includes me performing in my beliefs to the best of my ability.    Why would I want to do anything different?

Where I can only talk to women,

where the men run from me and ignore me, don't talk to me, treat me like I'm the plague....

(yah better watch that episode again)

And strangely

 - Noticing that SEX has a rather big deal

ALSO

over in the Asian Countries with all of the temple carvings and manuscripts I have seen, and that's just on the www and in books.  They are there because they have survived, and that someone believes they should stay.  I can bet at least $20 that there would have been similar statues and paintings in the "white/tanned/freckled" peoples' territories too, and maybe there are.  Nothing as OTT as what I've seen in Indonesia and India, maybe even Fiji. 

So there's lying there. 

The Holy Church profiteers from selling the birth control pills they tell and preach to their people not to use.  There are so many ways that religions dictate what happens, what people are instructed to believe and therefore to do.  Some true religions, which there are, and there can be also true devotees and parishioners of any kind of church or temple, no matter who it is lead by.  It is my wish that these people get to benefit for their goodness.

I want to encourage SCHOLARS to take part in research all about the religions, even if it is not what they say or say they do now.  Look at their history.  look at the reciepts and accounting from long time ago - most places that had a religion, knew how to write and had books, and collected taxes.  So they have records.  These records are telltale of what happens in that environment, particularly in the days of pen and ink, where it took a lot of effort to forge a document that took a few hours to write, and expensive paper.  now on the computers - I don't know about you - but I can't be stuffed with all of that shit.  It's boring to look at.  More boring than it was to be paid to file, so I know what I would rather do.  I don't say these things to get anyone "back" - I say them to assure people that there always is what there always was.

I think I have started hitting My head against the wall - my screen just made a bad noise......

so long, fuck-sticks...!

and it all comes out, I feel awkward, but kind of releaved I've told the truth.  Scared all the same that a molotov doesn't come through My front Window.  But I feel it sounds jumbled, all the things I've said too fast with not enough description.  ALL this from someone who actually studies languages and writes okay-like descriptive poetry and prose.

i don't know what more i can say, noone ever wants to listen!  to this or to anything i ever say - only my dog and the other animals.  that's who i have my faith with.  for anyone that is present, i would be the one pointing to the animal for my saviour, because no human has saved my arse yet.  most just walk away

so when i say things like in the last post - people seem to think it is my mental illness "TEMPORAL LOBE EPILEPSY" is the reason for me saying all these things.  at the moment I am under the best treatment i've had ever before.  so I'm not about to do anything weird, that my friends and family would know is mostly harmless and just makes me look like an idiot anyway.

if i look like an idiot over this - so be it - but i have a serious case of complaints here plus a few more that i've held back,  i've done what is legally correct.

don't be mean to me.  i am such a nice person and don't deserve this horrible treatment at all.  how can you do this to me? 

Started with a list of pros and cons.  couldn't find any pros.  more confusion, more tears.  more anguish and screaming with my fist inside my mouth to stop the sound being heard by the neaighbours, or if he was close, him WHO does it.

i've notice more hair and fur around my house than ever before - and there is not enough hair on my dog to warrant that amount.  someone is here - with black hair and/or a black haired dog.  Someone messy with fluids.

but i don't see them

i only hear them when they first come in the door, i can yell whatever i want to but i am about to pass out and not remember anything but dreams, waking up 15 hours later.

my ass covered in bood and sore. jesus will someone do something about this and listen to me instead of accusing me and saying i am insane. i mean it, i really do.  if it becomes a joke to me it will mean my mind has finally bent to the is cruel and horrible mind.

i don't have anyone here to protect me that doesn't want protection themselves.  we are all vulnerable, in different ways, but all of us are innocent and feel victimised.

i think they video it or take pics coz strangers say things about me making porn when i haven't, to my knowledge, sex since October, 2006. pregnancies have happened during that time, including doctors examinations.

they say theve seen me doing things, pictured in things... i don't know shit about that.  all i know is i give my opinion and not everyone likes it, but some can relate.  i would hope that those that are "my fans" as we all have those that will appreciate the works we do in our lives, would be sensible and still think of me as a person too.  if you treat me like this, and i find out, the law is on my side also with a knife pointed at your temple until they get here, understand?

my computer has absolutely no privacy in it at all.  i may as well be telling this to one of the roosting pigeons out in the backyard who are asleep now.  something spurs me on, i know if i keep pushing this can go my way, and somewhere, somehow there will be justice for this and every other misjustice that has come towards me and mine.

and it is not an eye for an eye.  it is comparing my truth with your lies, and having someone judge you for that - you cruel fucker.  society always did know how to sort people out, and I believe that My society is across the Heavens, Hell and all of the Universe.  So BEAT ME IF YOU STILL CAN.  One day - you'll slip up.  And that's when I will catch you or one of my friends will.

you piss and shit all over my house.  you think i can't tell my dog's and my shit from someone elses?  you must be stupid, and i know animals aside from my dog shit in my back yard too.  we've noted it.  ahh you probably get so pissed you can't make it to the toilet you fucking alcoholic. and it does annoy me, if you wanted to do that you've won.  it's really nice of you to take up my time cleaning up after your faeces and urine instead of cleaning the rest of my house, which noone else my sick body and mind will help me with.

i know you sleep or have sex (i doubt the kind of rape sex you have with me is this.)  in some of the rooms because i can smell it.  you stupid dickhead.

you steal food, supplies, fuck EVEN toilet paper

 you are all over anything I do online, and have even noticed those that are on to you also.  congratulations - you are being watched.  come closer to me, i want to end my own suffering by getting you to explain to all of these people who you have made believe in the lies you and your kind spread everywhere.

I feel like a victim

helpless

but trying to fight hard

not to be

trying to grab the

one thing

that may come to my

fertile mind to

 save me

if he's raping me and being nasty, i have no reason to want to be with him at all. 

he may think that's love

but I've had better treatment from

"ships passing in the night"

Surely not EVERYBODY is keeping a

secret oath if he rapes me and films it,

published wherever and whenever? 

One day I could be told by one of these peoples

I'VE PRAYED TO THE HIGHEST AND BEST GOOD GOD FOR A MIRACLE AND THAT'S ALL MY GOD DEALS IN.

I HAVE THE RIGHT TO ASK WHAT ANOTHER PERSON IS DOING ON MY PROPERTY OR IN MY HOUSE, AND REMOVE THEM NON-VIOLENTLY.  I CAN PROTECT MYSELF, WHATEVER IT TAKES.

WHY DOES SOMEONE HAVE THIS FUCKED UP INTEREST IN ME?  HAVE I ENCOURAGED PEOPLE TO REACT IN A DERANGED WAY TO ME?  BUT WHY NON-LOVING, TOO?  AND NASTY?

I'D LIKE TO SEE HIM TRY TO RAPE AND PILLAGE ME WHILE I'M AWAKE.

THAT WOULD BE A WHOLE OTHER BALL GAME.

SORRY IF THIS HAS MADE ANY OF MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY UPSET, YOU SHOULD BE.  THIS IS MY REALITY AND I HAVE LIVED WITH IT THINKING ONE DAY ONE OF YOU WOULD HELP ME.  AND NONE OF YOU HAVE.  SO FOR ME - THAT DOESN'T LOOK SO GOOD

IF I AM WRONG AND YOU LOVE ME SO MUCH, GO AHEAD AND PROVE IT. THIS IS THE WAY I FEEL IN ALL HONESTY AND IT ABSOLUTELY TEARS ME IN HALF TO LET YOU GET TO ME - IF THERE IS A MISUNDERSTANDING, COME FORTH.

There can be inferences from other sources

(mostly Demoniac)

in response to

Your action/spell/statement

even not directed at them.

So it must be

tried and tested,

common knowledge

at least to one group of scholars.

Or

BELIEF

that it could be applied.

There is so much I think but cant prove

But Im

seeking clues and evidence

in the meantime, the thing is,

these days evidence has to come in a

USER FRIENDLY format to ALL viewers

LOL

There is a

TRICKY lyric

that says something along those lines,

that they cant believe whats said until its seen done

OF COURSE.

A PRINCIPLE OF REALITY TESTING

Most people are so wrapped up in their own lives, what YOU notice about them will MOST LIKELY not be a reflection on you but a result of THEIR issues

DR L. K. 2011

.................

RELAXING, BEING ABLE TO KEEP A BALANCED MIND WITH VERY FEW FEARS, WHICH I MUST ALLAY.

TRYING TO KEEP MY MIND

CLEAR AND UNTAINTED

WITH EVIL.

I MISS U

THOSE THAT COME AT ME

NEGATIVELY

I TRY TO STOP OR DEAL WITH IF I CAN

THERE I COULD HAVE ASSISTANCE

NO MATTER NOW, BUT ONE NEVER CAN BE TOO SURE.

Beyond all physicality is a place sublime.

 If love has reached there,

the journey to infinity has begun

BACK TO THE PARANOIA

THE MIND BEING OVERWORKED, ISSUES ALL IRRELEVANT - CLAMOUR AND CLANG TOGETHER TRYING TO LULL MY NIGHT IN TO EVENTUAL SLEEP AND NOISE PEACE IN THE SUBURBS   

ITS A NOISY NIGHT  

MAYBE NOT EVERYONE IS ON EMAIL, FACEBOOK OR ADDICTED2TXT.

A SHAMANS VISIT COULD DO ME WELL

 MAYBE GO OVERBOARD

 BUT ID TRY TO STAY LEVEL  I DOUBT I COULD

I BET THEYD TRAP ME SOMEHOW

 AND HELP ME EVEN THOUGH POISON IS IN THE AIR LOL

Enlightenment, the personal experience of Reality, is manZ ultimate experience   The quest for this experience is the most difficult quest upon which He can embark   It demands of Him faith, determination, sacrifice, and, above all, passion    Without the sustained sense of urgency which passion imparts, the goal cannot be achieved

 I. MIURA

THINK OF ME TONIGHT IN YOUR DREAMS AND YOU WILL BE WITH ME HERE TOMORROW

please look at these videos and blogs ------

(TREATMENT IS A NAUGHTY WORD ON BIGBLOG! WTF?)

http://www.treehugger.com/files/2011/04/shocking-video-dairy-calves-bludgeoned.php

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=6366t4ramD8

http://www.treehugger.com/files/2011/05/look-inside-humane-slaughter-house.php?campaign=daily_nl

http://www.treehugger.com/files/2011/05/youtube-removes-dairy-calf-cruelty-video.php?campaign=daily_nl

and then tell me again you are happy eating meat?

GROWING UP, WE DIDN'T HAVE TRUCKS THAT PICKED UP SPECIFIC BIN SHAPE AND WERE OPERATED BY "THE BIN MAN" IN THE FRONT SEAT OF A LARGE, AIR CONDITIONED, CLOSED IN CAB VEHICLE, WHATEVER THE CATEGORY OF WASTE WAS.

WHERE WE LIVED WE HAD 2-4 BOGAN MEN (CONSIDERED TO BE VERY "POOR" AND "LOW CLASS") WHO WOULD RUN BEHIND A STINKY TRUCK, GRABBING THE (OFTEN OVERFLOWING)MEDIUM SIZED CANS AND BAGS NEAR DRIVEWAYS, TO THROW THEIR CONTENTS IN THE OPEN MASHER. THE TRUCK WOULD STOP AND WHEN THE BIN MEN WERE DONE THEY'D BANG ON THE TRUCK AND SHOUT "DONE! MOVE ON!" AT 6AM ON A WEEKDAY (TWAS MONDAY FOR MY STREET) - IT WOULD ALWAYS WAKE ME AND PISS ME OFF!!!!

BACK THEN, NOT ONLY WAS THE SENSELESS RUBBISH COLLECTION FAR TOO CRAZY, BUT THERE WERE DIFFERENT LAWS ABOUT DOGS, TOO.  SOME PEOPLE WOULD LET THEIR DOGS ROAM FREE, ESPECIALLY AT NIGHT, AND ON BIN NIGHT, THAT'D MEAN IF THE DOG LIKED THE SMELL AND WAS INQUISITIVE OR HUNGRY ENOUGH - YOUR TRASH WOULD END UP STREWN ALL OVER THE YARD, WIND BLOWING SOME DOWN TO THE NEIGHBOURS.

WHEN WE'D GO OUT ON THE NATIONAL HIGHWAYS, MY MUM AND DAD DID NOT LET US KIDS THROW TRASH OUT THE WINDOW LIKE WE SAW SO MANY OTHERS DO. 

LATER IN LIFE, I'D PICK THAT KIND OF TRASH UP WHILST TAKING A WALK.  EVEN CIGARETTE BUTTS, COZ THERE WERE SO MANY EVERYWHERE.

DURING MY MEAT EATING TEENS, AROUND YEAR 11 OR 12, MY FRIENDS STARTED TO OWN CARS AND DRIVE TO SCHOOL; SURE, I DID TOO WITH MUM AND DAD'S CAR.

WE WOULD HAVE A CAR FULL OF BOYS AND GIRLS AND HEAD OFF TO THE NEARBY JUNKS FOODS DRIVE THRU, GET SO MUCH CRAP, AND MY FRIENDS WERE THROWING THE RUBBISH OUT THE WINDOW.  I KNOW I WAS NOT THE ONLY ONE THAT THOUGHT THIS WAS BARBARIC.

EVEN BACK THEN, ALL THOSE SITUTAIONS HELPED CREATE WHAT THE POLLUTION CRISIS IS TODAY.  DON'T MAKE MORE MISTAKES TO DAMAGE OUT EARTH - IT IS A PART OF EVERYONE'S FUTURE!

Hmmmmmm......

For those of you who know me,

I may've told you about

 when I had a vision

 of the weekend of

 27 and 28 August 1997.

I felt that

(what I always call Her)

 - Lady Di,

had visited Me. 

 All She said was - look after My Boys.

I thought

HOW the Hell will I be able to do that????????

since then,

I have looked more closely

at the day of her death

 - 28 August -

happens to be

the first day of the Egyptian Calendar

 --------------------

 who was it that She was dating at the time????!!!!

Man - I am sooooo not cool with this at all. 

 I really loved Her.

The following is about a conspiracy theory, namely about HARRP (jfgi) - the words are not my own, and they do not necessarily reflect the way I feel or think about the issue - but I've got to say - I'VE WATCHED THE FEMBOTS - I'm no stoopid douche bag!!!!!

Broadcasting the Deception of the New World Order and 2012

2010, Starting out with Earthquakes and a Bang of Disasters. 2010 is starting out with powerful earthquakes and other expressions of nature that are causing disasters for thousands of people around the globe. Could these disasters of earthquakes, and other powerful weather occurrences be natural, or could the sinister control freaks of the New World Order be manipulating these disasters with their advanced ldquo;secretrdquo; technology?

Antarctica.On Antarctica, an ice-glacier block, the size of Oahu of Hawaii broke away and is now drifting. The scientists are perplexed over the occurrence. Oahu may not be the biggest island of Hawaii, but it is a huge size of land ; if you have visited then you will comprehend the immense size the ice-glacier block.

A Storm Called Xynthia.In Western Europe a storm, called ldquo;Xynthiardquo;, blew into France early Sunday with hurricane-force winds, flooding ports, destroying homes and leaving 1 million households without electricity. It also battered Belgium, Portugal, Spain and parts of Germany and snarled train and air travel throughout the continent. About 60 people have died and the cost 3 million Eurorsquo;s of emergency aid from the disaster.

Note: Hurricane force winds hitting France from the Atlantic seacoast?

The Snow in the US Northeast.Major snow blizzards in the northeast of the United States are occurring this winter, the northeast experienced a 3rd major snow storm. Some residents of long island have commented that they have never experience a harsh winter as this year. They are calling the current snow storm in New York the biggest and deadliest snowstorm and using the unofficial terminology as a ldquo;Snow Hurricanerdquo; or a ldquo;Snowicanerdquo;. Two feet in the cities and up three feet of snow in the suburbs around New York state is the report.

for the Global future, I see - massive regeneration of existing species.  Lush growth of plants, healthy people and animals.  And finding the apparently extinct species, which we will then work together to breed.

A VEGETARIAN WORLD

As the Earth is regenerated, each person will be calmer and easily be able to feel the Zenlike atmosphere.  It will bring us closer and closer at every moment while experiencing this, people will elect to do spiritual study and further endeavours, no matter who their God/Gods/Goddess/Goddesses is or isn't. Heaven on Earth, Heaven everywhere...

Produce and Production will be local, but sold to a Global Market.

12 leaders in 12 areas of the world.  One leader for both Heaven and Hell, forming a trilogy that will eventually be otherwise explained.

Restoration of any available object - by self or others as part of an interest, artistry, enviroconcern and chic et al.  Producing items will be done in limited numbers, with many people seeing the effort to reuse as a priority.  That would mean that we will get to use all those things in the endless land fills and the plastic oceans.  Initially, people will go crazy over the idea, as people do with any new fad!  Hoarding it and searching for it, trading things, and really this is the way a lot of people live now, but it's not the same - I'm saying it will be done as a fun thing, not as a way of life that can't be bettered.

Of course the personal collective consciousnesses will form, seaprating groups and the "the strong will rise against the weak" (quote from Layla's Heretik)

(Originally at time of writing this out on paper) I don't see how the defeat of the weak maybe done, and nor do I hope for it.  That is perhaps part of the confusion...

SORRY, WE'VE OVERPOPULATED THIS WORLD - SOME OF YA HAVE GOT TO GO!

MORE... ANOTHER TIME...

About 20 years ago, I was out the front of a popular Gay Club in Adelaide.  I was talking to one of the streetkids that were always out the front begging for drugs or money to get drugs (mainly harder stuff).  I asked him what he was doing here in the middle of the night alone ndash; didnrsquo;t he feel threatened?  He said hersquo;d been on the streets for a while, and that he was waiting for his friend.  I ask what his friend is doing, he says ldquo;Giving a guy a blowjob round the corner in the alleyrdquo;.  Hmmm.  OKAY.  Well ndash; it was a Gay club, so I wasnrsquo;t all that surprised, until the continuation ldquo;Hersquo;s getting $10 if he can make him cum and swallows itrdquo; (Amanda thinks ndash; GROSS) What are you going to do with the $10 when you get it?  He says do it a few more times and wersquo;ll have enough for a bag of weed! Out comes his friend, a huge plump round ball of a tall kid, with a very strange look on his face, lips quivering.  The dude who obviously got the blow job walked out behind him, back to his own friends.  They were the older people that We didnrsquo;t know, these guys had high positions around town, and were known for paying young boys for many different types of services.   [IT wasnrsquo;t PART OF the Gay Club ndash; so donrsquo;t accuse me of dissing that ndash; I get in to Gay Clubs, I used to dance around in my bra at some of them whilst on Ecstacy years ago!] I canrsquo;t forget that kid ndash; obviously ndash; but today had a strange feeling that his skeletal face was looking at me the same way, I felt like hersquo;d been killed.  I donrsquo;t know anything about that, or anything about most of the Gay Guysrsquo; lives.  Itrsquo;s been a long time since I hung around these people. I was thinking, in my own want for weed ndash; would I have ever given a stranger a blow job AND SWALLOWED?   NO ndash; and for ten bucks ndash; ABSOLUTELY NO WAY.   I havenrsquo;t ever prostituted Myself and donrsquo;t ever plan to.  I know that a lot of people see it as an ldquo;easyrdquo; way to get cash, but I donrsquo;t think of it as ldquo;easyrdquo;hellip; more like a worse chore than cleaning up a room full of vomit and shit. I hope those two streetys eventually found their way in life, some do ndash; some donrsquo;t.   Not much I can do about it now?

To reach out and touch you when I wake up

To hold you when we go to sleep

After making love and spending all day together

Spending our lives together

Being free with what we say to each other

And being rewarded for that freedom

The prediction in its true words was

“Dear Krishna, You are the killer of all the fears of the inhabitants of Vrindavana. You are the supremely powerful hero, and we know that You can kill the unnecessary pride of Your devotee as well as the pride of women like us simply by Your beautiful smile.” (Songs of the Gopis, Krishna, The Supreme Personality of Godhead, Vol 1, Ch 31)

Energy spell directions taken with care

To gather more energy, you must take the energy of another. Energy does not appear by itself, but can be supernaturally sent. 

I am a vegetarian, won't kill animals, I wouldn't and couldnrsquo;t kill my loved ones, so I thought HOW CAN I KILL?  I could kill an insect but that would be very little energy gain, perhaps not even noticeable.

KILL THE MUSIC AKA TURN IT DOWN!

OR KILL A CD  -  I sacrificed a CD that related to the situation, it went pop like a gun!  I went to sleep and since then my energy has returned!

Use the power of words in this situation. 

KILLJOY

USE your mind

Use your mind

Use your dicitionary and your mind

Be creative

Feel the way it goes out of you and gets larger than you and then comes back inside of you and you get larger than it and it becomes a smaller part of you that you find everything in

Remember killing something that is human or animal comes with severe punishment, and is against what I am trying to tell you about.  Killing, that is, MURDER - is an offence punishable by crime, as is Animal Abuse.

Killing bugs and insects still comes with Karma - but one must carefully check what the pros and cons are, as the small dead insects can often be a small top up of energy that can still help.  Sometimes they come to Me and seem to be sacrificing themselves..... ???

i hate the bloody formatting problem that never seems to go away no matter what I do!

http://www.himalmag.com/component/content/article/3455-psychedelic-mr-claus.html

http://www.soy.com.au/id-like-to-try-soy-milk/recipes/all-recipe-list/scones

http://www.care2.com/causes/animal-welfare/blog/video-shows-beating-of-britains-oldest-circus-elephant/

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/03/24/scitech/main20047055.shtml

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DkaZsJjmRfY

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A7Er5TsQrGg

http://www.theage.com.au/opinion/politics/no-nukes-now-or-ever-20110319-1c1ed.html

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=82hsGFVSeiE

http://www.urlesque.com/2011/03/10/sad-etsy-boyfriends/

http://www.newint.com.au/shop/elephant-poo-journal-2576.htm

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/03/24/scitech/main20047055.shtml

I WAS IN LOVE WITH A PAEDOPHILE

BUT HE NEVER SAW MY SMILE

HIS EYES WERE ALWAYS AIMED AT

AN UNDER-AGED GIRL'S TWAT

MY LOVE FOR THAT PAEDOPHILE

HAS EVEN GONE ON MY POLICE FILE

LIKE I'M THE ONE TO BLAME

FOR HIS DESIRES FINDING YOUNGSTERS FOR GAME

MY PAEDOPHILE DID NOT KNOW WHAT TO THINK

WHEN I SAID "FIX MY SINK"

HE PREFERRED THEM YOUNG AND FRESH

AS ALWAYS THAT'S WHAT HE THOUGHT WAS BEST

THE PAEDOPHILE SAID "SWEET SIXTEEN"

AND ALL HIS FRIENDS KNEW WHAT THAT DID MEAN

THEY WERE IN IT FOR THE GRAB

BECAUSE THERE WERE NO OTHER REAL WOMEN TO BAG

by Isabel Debres

(notes and pics by Belladonna Princess)

When a crisis strikes the globe, people all over the world seem to open their hearts and pull out their checkbooks. But why do people donate to one disaster, and not another? Why $100 for the earthquake in Haiti, for instance, and a pittance for the floods in Pakistan? Why more for a tsunami than a genocide? Looking into the psychology of post-disaster donations, I discovered some interesting theories.

 

Whether people dole out their money and how much they give often depends on the media--on the portrayal of the need more than the actual need--according to Noam Shpancer, Ph.D. For the earthquake in Haiti, the Red Cross alone raised a quarter of a billion dollars. For the floods in Pakistan, which affected ten times as many people, the organization raised just 6.9 million dollars.

 

More news coverage, more help

 

 

Dr. Shpancer believes this was partly because Haiti is closer to America than Pakistan and more accessible for media coverage. Within hours of the earthquake, every American inbox was flooded with heart-breaking images of Haitians trapped in the rubble. The floods in Pakistan got nowhere near the same amount of cyber space and air time. Also, since floods are more common than earthquakes, they provoke less of an emotional response.

 

 

Recent research from Royal Holloway, University of London reveals that people are more likely to donate money to help victims of a natural disaster than a humanitarian crisis. The conflict in Darfur has killed 300,000 people and displaced almost three million. In 2004, the most destructive tsunami in history killed 150,000 people.

 

Helping move our world toward fairness

 

Although the magnitude of the Darfur crisis is twice as great, the tsunamigalvanized more public support. Dr. Hanna Zagefka, from the Department of Psychology at Royal Holloway, speculates this tendency comes from an inherent human need to believe the world functions in a fair-minded and just manner--which she refers to as the "just world belief." In a twist of psychological logic, natural disasters that come out of nowhere seem to be less "justified" than catastrophes caused by humans fighting each other.

 

 

According to this theory, we even go so far as to blame the victims of war and genocide more, and are therefore more apt to help the victims of Mother Nature. In addition, Dr. Zagefka explains,

 

"the research shows that victims of natural disasters are generally also perceived to make more of an effort to help themselves, and people like to 'reward' those who are proactive by donating to them."

 

Be it a natural or human crisis, whether we see it on CNN or stumble across it in an obscure blog, the need for disaster relief and humanitarian aid exists all over the globe. We're good at reacting with our hearts and our wallets. Understanding our minds in this process may help us to become even better.

 

many people will donate and help charities if their peers do also.  

In a situation where someone requires help immediately in front of people, if one person acts to help, many will follow.

I believe not to give money unless you crunch the numbers for a budget and decide you have a surplus of money.  There are so many things to donate to these days, everyone is after a buck, and some of us need that money to live off of, so don't get yourself in to credit card debt because you feel good that you've donated. 

Sxs I wonder how the news reporters can get themselves in to those zones and come out alive!  And how they can stand there are report when hell is breaking lose all around them.  but the truth is - we don't see what happens when the camera isn't rolling, and as this story above says, more news - more people are aware and become concerned.  We all wanted to know how our mates were here in Australia when the QLD floods hit, and the media told us before the helplines did, so it is great that we are becoming a more compassionate society through this, even if the disasters that we have battled have been so awful.

And if there is a particular subject you are interested in, keep your donations reserved for them, and don't diversify just because other charities get in first or are more persistent with calls, doorknocking or letters.

The charities want to make it easy for you to donate, so they will set up any way possible of doing it, and they sure will not ask you if your donation is within your budget.

The CEOs of Charities and upper level staff are often paid huge amounts, and this is taken out of your donation, as well as all the other expenses, so for every dollar you give, because you want to see the starving people eat a big mac, a large portion will never even make it to their country.

Some of the best charity donations come in the way of being a volunteer - putting in hours or even long hours of work is so valuable to charities, they always need volunteers to help get along.

Free advertising for charities helps too - bumper stickers, a tshirt and all of the merchandise in every which way it comes these days - helps out immensely as the Charity gets the profits of the item, and then the customer promotes the charity.  Great gift idea also.

Donating goods is great, also - but don't donate things that are old and crappy. People that have had their livelihoods cut will do much better with clean, new things if that is possible.  Give them money so that they can buy what they really need, instead of Aunt Megan's ornate 70s lampshade.

U2 had a good theory - they bought the trucks, loaded them up with food and went and delivered it themselves/with their staff.  It's not something everyone can do - but it is a worthy way of making sure your Charity does hit the targets you really want.

The Hare Krishnas  have a program where schools and poorer communities are fed "PRASADAM" (Blessed food); one of the websites that talks about the devotee volunteers at Andhra Pradesh, in particular, is http://www.foodrelief.org/articles/update-on-food-relief-programs-in-andhra-pradesh.html 

Look @ the moon, itrsquo;s nearly the NEW MOON again.  CHILLING OUT, slowing down bewilderment gone I feel so peaceful when I accomplish something.  

The psychedelic visions move Me beyond belief and shudder through the land I donrsquo;t touch.

I think of each one of My friends, feeling like Miss Helena with her magic mirror, (who says She can see all these people through the mirror, but they are really kids at Home watching) Nearly vomiting as the quake subsides

I tap in to the evening sickness of a pregnancy that is not mine.

My s***s lift and shake in the breeze I taste the lucky I had only light day before.  I overdosed and vomited the holy breakfast a friend entrusted me with.

Eating, reverting, My back aches, because of its uprightness andtheinsectsmarkthemillisecondsto

BOOM

Tension in the air I could cut with a karma knife

but My toxic little pals fend off any nasty intervention.

I was so wise to become Vegetarian and sometimes Vegan. I promise Veganism for tomorrow, but am unsure how I will feel then.

My shorts wet with the pocketed produce I care not as My Passion zooms/courses through my veins.

Geesh, People these days really do expect everything served to them on a silver platter with trimmings, and a hot towelhellip;.

I want to talk about God, You want to talk about Sex and Love and Food. 

So, for Me to have to tell You about God through those examples, makes it all very confusing for some.  I could sit here all day (even though itrsquo;s the middle of the night) and list the relationships that show God in Sex, Love and Food ndash; or Whatever ndash; Cars, if thatrsquo;s the way Ya want it.  But You will be reading goobldy-gook, until Your mind is open to God, and You admit to God You need help, that God can provide all Your answers, that God exists for Pleasure.

God has it all in control.  God has a plan and a purpose for each of Us. It is Godrsquo;s will that We are born to succeed, if You donrsquo;t feel like Yoursquo;re succeeding, You are not obeying God and this will show.  Itrsquo;s not God that makes a mess of Your Life, God wants things (including You) to be perfect, and any sense of badness is due to Yer own darn fault.  Listen and Learn, Dear People, Learn what God is now and how God can help You.  God always is and always will be.  God is Forever, lasts Forever and will Forever see You through, and see through You. No matter what You have done, God loves You anyway.

In regards to Sex and God ndash; God meant Sex to be for pleasure with someone that also gives You pleasurehellip;  Have You head the well-bred answer to ldquo;Thank yourdquo;? It is ldquo;My pleasurerdquo;hellip; When having sex We ask God to bind Us together, to give us the ultimate feeling of being one of two and two of one.  If You share this with someone You donrsquo;t love ndash; You are a FOOLhellip;

In regard to Love and God ndash; Out of all the crushes, flirts, fancies, relationships and rejections, God is capable of giving more love to You than any of those people.  In that way, when Single, one can give LOVE over to God, and have the feeling of being in love like a newly wed.  This is how You should be with God.  If the enjoyment goes, or is stale, it is time to see where You and God have grown apart, and why this is? (Just like a relationship)

Food and God ndash; ask any Hare Krishna! J Why do lsquo;religiousrsquo; people say grace? To say a small Thanks to God, and to say how much You enjoy Godrsquo;s rewards to You, also asking for things can be included ndash; like sweet talking a friend or business associate.

For every topic You can pick, God has an existing relationship there; God created it, so God holds it how it needs to be held. No matter what You say Your God/Gods/Goddess/Goddesses name is/are there is all a commonality ndash; the Highest God is the ldquo;Positiverdquo; God. The God of Truth.  Worshipping any God lower than that, perse a ldquo;Negativerdquo; God is no use, because You will fall prey to them as You walk away from Godrsquo;s more than outstretched arms.  The Good God will defeat the Bad God IF it is the Good Godsrsquo; desire.  God has many desires, to predict what God wants is not such a good idea because none of Us really know.  Whoever says ldquo;I knowrdquo; walk away from them or engage in debate.  They will come to agree the Highest, Best Good God knows it all and ainrsquo;t telling.

It makes me wonder somex about which way the world is headed?  In my mind ndash; it will be like Heaven and Earth are One.  Hell will be banished forever as the collective consciousness reigns and keeps us from a lack of understanding between one another.

To unite, it is crucial, and neither you or I can stop it happening.  For so long The Spiritual Warriors have seen to it that this will occur, overriding the predictions of most Ancient Religions, but not all.  There has been very powerful magic that has lead to a change that is more hopeful for us all, yet still satisfies the requests of most religions.   People will not be able to deny the truth when they are asked to represent themselves.

 little lamb - on a hill - run fast as you can,

because Christians, they want to kill you

and your life has not even begun...

youre just like me...

Sometimes I wonder why Silvereye commit suicide? I guess thatrsquo;s the same for most self-killers.  I know She was very unwell, for a long time, She obviously had nothing else left in Her life.  I remember a stage where She was in bed all the time and She got worse after that, though I never saw Her.  It was like She didnrsquo;t WANT help.  Or maybe didnrsquo;t believe it would work?

I recall for Her Birthday, She was having a little party which I was invited to.  I couldnrsquo;t go because I was sick Myself, just out of Hospital. She was really offended!! I told Her also, around that time (end of 1998) She should arrange to pick up Her artworks from My House, after having produced them there when She was house-sitting for Me. She never did, NOONE ever did. Thatrsquo;s why Irsquo;ve still got them! Did She plan that? Because She knew I looked after things more than the others.  When I move house, everything goes with Me, not a throw away because one canrsquo;t fit It in onersquo;s matesrsquo; van on a last minute move (ANYMORE!)

Was it an early sign of wanting to be remembered?  How long did She plan Her suicide ahead of time?  What did She want to say to the World about Herself in the event of Her death?

Only a few people attended Her funeral, I couldnrsquo;t because ndash; once again ndash; I was ill. I thought how Shersquo;d gone to being popular and lively, fun and great to be around, to sick and annoyingly withdrawn, complacent and no longer a fighter.  What a change life sickness can bring.

Written August, 1998, in Candi Dasa, Bali, Indonesia

On the days after seeing Him I am familiarly affected and preoccupied.

I had not guessed I would change my mind about affections but it dawns on Me that is what true appreciation is all about.

I compose familiar aspects of My Life to suit the feel, turning in to an almost lesbian and an obsessive reorganiser now My Home is Mine once more.

How could He change My Mind? I thought He did not have the sway; I find His subtle niggling intoxicating, more fascinating and beautiful than the previous times Irsquo;ve fallen for Him. Yet still He seems hesitant though My Chatty Friends suggest it is ldquo;The Big Thingrdquo;. When I am satisfied I picture Myself in the situation I have long planned for, ambiguously talked about but structured in form.

Sweet electronic communication links Us and We know each other enough to not talk though His simple question unnerved Me.

He spanks Me by gliding past and pashes My Neck by facing My Direction. He is Emperor to Me in theory but I see a hazy outline of this in reality. I hear of skills but see no evidence. It is faith I have in Him, faith stronger by night.

Why is He testing Me? What do You think? Does He worship Me silently?

A random male picks up what could be His thoughts, writing them in soft, slow poetry motion.  Do YOU know Me?

Similarity breeds contempt it seems. He drifts out of the night like a whisper heard over 20,000 light years. Subtle, beautiful, polite.

previously I have posted 100 ways to say "I love you" maybe I shouldnt have deleted it because it was hit-popular Here are ways to say Hello in most of the imaginable ways... Ive always liked the Eskimo way, rubbing of the nose... but I#m fussy with who I say Hello to in that way! It pays to be fussy!

During mind meltdown and lack of inspiration as reported, I am trying to get out of it, and it could all come out of me colouring every element of your monitor and my world...

I've lost inspiration

To me I have failed

 no longer can I see what I need to say

so it's better I say nothing at all

Time goes by quickly and I forget the reason why I even made this blog...

It has come to the point where it rarely makes me happy anymore, and I feel my luck running out on it.

For me to share my feelings with the indiscriminate public has been a big effort of learning and bravery, also it has made me stick to my words after I've spoken them, and to be more responsible with what I say.  I hate it that some people are offended, while others are in the mode of glee.  The Human Race really makes no sense to me the way that it is.  So I will keep on keeping to my ideas of a better world yet to come.  I don't want to exclude anyone, but there are people I'm trying to forgive inside Myself on a daily basis.  So much hurt inside leads to a bitter woman.  I get no sensible encouragement that inspires me, but do not feel a calling to anywhere else on the internet.... Maybe it's time again that I started avoiding it?  Sure, I can use it for what I want to - but it doesn't mean I have to say anything. (IF I can resist)

I never understood the whys and wherefores that seemed so apparent to the others, for that I don't thank any of you for showing me the ropes.  In fact, most of the people have been outright BASTARDS.

So why bother putting my deepest, innermost thoughts online for others to mock and profit from?  When I started, it was a good idea, but things change and my ideas have too....

So we will see about what's next?  Who can ever tell??????

HERE IS A LINK TO WHERE MY RECIPES ARE NOW LOCATED ALA WWW

http://www.recipelover.com.au/profile.aspx?id=31690

ENJOY!

but of course, in a woman's world, the older one gets and the longer one has been taking drugs, leads to the look of a 50 year old junkie, probably 20 years before that age occurs.

I have observed this look in men, too.

I don't recommend anyone to do drugs throughout their whole lives, or even to have sex with many partners, but if you are going to - make sure it's with someone who is equal to you, not worse or less.  The real fun is good clean fun, that one can remember always and feel happy and not guilty about...

good luck to you all finding the right person to do what you want to with, and I hope they will want it done in return....

The first thing that I will get off My Very Ample Chest is this - why do MiddleAged MEN always like to be surrounded by young little girls?  You're telling they can't keep up, 22 year olds never have been able to with Myself neither.  Even when I was that age. 

I once had a friend who was working in the Adult Film Industry and he said he didn't like it so much that he was always paired with newbies, that have tighter VAGINAS than older women... he could never get off, and found the pleasures of that industry minimal.  I asked him - why don't you want to be with a women who is experienced?  He couldn't with film, for contract reasons, but in his private life he stuck to young hussies, also.  No disrespect to anyone in the porn industry, it's just a fun term, okay?  I wonder why these guys even feel attracted to these so much younger women?  I have had many opportunities to be with underage guys, and have never been that impressed (unless they are older guys faking it with sexting).  I'm not saying that everyone should go for someone their age, but I just wonder why they bother...  experience is not available when the experience has not been had. 

Before I gave up drugs, I could've done more than anyone you could pick.  It was not a challenge.  However, when I would share with youngsters, it's "I think I better leave now", because they just weren't up to it - not experienced enough.  I think that the guys who are in particular in the spotlight these days, but can also be local fuckwits, like to go for these teeny tiny tweenies to make themselves feel better when they can't do something they are "meant" to, or have bragged about before..... Sex with younger girls - ha I remember the first guy I had sex with I thought his dick was big and he was a really good lay - what a joke that was!  all so untrue, proven when I went for the next!  If you think older women have VAGINAS LIKE A SLEEVE OF A WIZARD (THANKS BORAT) - then maybe you've got a bitch that doesn't look after herself right.  EVEN MORE LIKELY you've got a SMALL COCK.  After having done the deed with a few different men *cough* I came upon realising that guys' dicks are often different sizes... and hardnesses, not just compared to each other, but for their own person, each time we did it.  And erectile dysfunction is amongst us and threatens the bed of every heterosexual man and woman, or homosexual men.  So many guys blame the chick "you're not turning me on" - well, you start wanking yourself, and when you get hard then I'll come and join in, okay, sugar?  THEY RUN...  Don't blame someone else because you can't cum.  Because after that they aren't even going to feel free to try.

Hmm - I'll leave that there, because I feel crap, and I shouldn't even be on the computer, I'm sick - and it's not like there is anyone getting the drinks, eh? So try not to annoy me, or you'll find yourself discussed here.

BIGBLOG WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO FIX YOURSELF     I NEED PUNCTUAL PUNCTUATION ARRRRGGGHHH

so... IMO I get very uptight in public. If something happens that "goes wrong" it tends to put me way off, even something as small as dropping my purse. Say - in the checkout - I can't focus for long enough to have a big amount of shopping put through. When I first got out of hospital I would forget some of my shopping bags. Now I try to do a mental checklist. It's a little over the top, but it does work a lot better for me.

I even get funny when people are looking at me too much, or I percieve they are talking about me. Which is dumb because I even grew up around here and that should be quite okay with me, but it isn't.

I feel like everything revolves around me in a lot of ways, so when I go shopping I can get into like a trance of joy (?) that becomes heady and sometimes uncontrollable and I will do stupid stuff like overspend, or tell someone something inapppropriate. I often embarass myself, and people can't see that I don't mean to do that and I hate it as much as I think they do too.
Also, a lot of the time when I'm on strong meds I fear that I will fall asleep somewhere and not be protected. This is a HUGE fear of mine, real or not. Usually it means I limit where I go or stay home. I also worry about myself driving in that state, even though the shops aren't that far away.

Once the owner of a shop commented on the amount of junk food I was buying... I didn't go back to that shop for about 6-8 months! I felt like he had made a fool out of me, but when I rationalise it - he's fatter than moi, and he's the one that is selling these types of things to whoever...

IT's really hard to get motivated to go to the shops also. In school holidays, or on saturdays and thursday nights - I hate the screaming children with their inadequate parents (usually Mom). It really upsets me, because of an incident that happened earlier in my life. I get really uncomfortable and want to have a go at them.

Boost immunity fresh fruit, spinach, chard and chinese greens. protein from digestable sources. keep in control around the house of bugs and nests of spiders, dirt and dust. I like to spray bug repellent on the door, and a little on the door mat. and on scrubs. these days "infection" and "plague" is so easy to start. I use the little sterilizing strips from the chemist (used to clean small surfaces) to clean surfaces thoroughly, bleach and disinfect. A product called "vital greens". local honey. garlic. lots of herbs to eat and growing. sunshine 20 minutes a day, unless on medication that opposes any of these...

I've also been watching alot of Saturday Night Live on Netflix. I'm sure you can get them on like u tube or something. They can be really funny. Justin Timberlake was on 4 times. He's actually quite good. I was suprised. He was dressed as a cup of soup in one scetch. Thought you could use the lift:)

I think you should do some writing, you are sooo good at it! and of course every thing you do doesn't have to be your only job forever! so even if you did that , made some money and did something else depending on circumstances then!

I've been thinking of you and you are the only person I associate the worries I have myself about myself with, what I'm trying to say, is that you mirror the problems I have, but definitely don't make it worse for me!!! it is nice to have someone to have something in common with, even if it is painful. I pray for you, I'm trying to find the deity which recieves these thoughts the most. I think that will help both of us.

I've had a terrible time lately, going through hell with my ex-bestfriend and my family, and the doc is worried about me too!

geez - when will this end - when will there be peace and happiness that lasts more than a couple of hours?

Boondox Twizted Amb

it's all cool, I'm enjoying it

I envy you

hmmm are you going to tell me why or should I guess?

why do you hate me?

why won't you date me?

I don't want you to impregnate me

Stop trying to frustrate me

These feelings we have to aerate

Before we reach the use by date

And Our lives stagnate

Whilst we could have it all on a plate

When will I hear from you?

I hope I will not miss this chance

To love you

and complete Life's most exciting Dance

I always thought that love means everything to a girl like me.  But how could it when it's not even there?  It's been so long now - I don't know where to look - at you or at someone new, or have a one night screw?  My patience wore thin a long time ago, and I just hope my intuition is right, although I feel lost and I feel that noone is there and nobody cares!  I don't know if there is anyone out there that fancies me at all!  I don't know what to do!!!!  All my hopes and dreams about the way love should or could be for me are not turning out.  I'm not living the romantic dream I wanted to.  I barely smile anymore unless it's at My Dog or in the mirror.  What have I done to deserve this?  Why have I been totally leftout in life?  There are many people I have been friends with for a long time, that haven't even seen me with a partner, ever!  And why - because I haven't had one in so long!  Guys run from me, saying they don't want to commit, so I think, we'll take it easy, and they lose interest.  I think it is just that I have not met the one I need to love.  And I don't think I will for a long long long time.  It makes me so upset, doing all the things a partner should do, for myself.  It is very upsetting to have this experience that will never be made up for.

So tonight, if there is someone out there you love or like a lot, let them know - or if it's me let me know!  I think too many people miss out on the fun to be had because they are too shy, or son't know the right words, or are just socially-fukt-up.  I think all of those apply to me, but when I tell guys I like them I never hear from them again.  C'mon - am I really that scary and unattractive?

Remember: the sooner you tell someone of your affection, the sooner you get to kiss them, is usually the way things go!

I can't express my love enough, if I could write it permanently in the sky I would, but you don't even seem to notice anything I do, or it's not to your taste.  Well - be a BIG BOY and let me know I'm wide off the mark, and you are not the one for me, if that's the way you feel, BUSTER!

around this time of year, if the People in Power have worked hard, they will able to take a rest and have others to keep life pumping in to the purpose.  It is nice to be honoured for the same. 

It's a time I chose to spend by myself as noone has the same thoughts on this time of year, that I do anyway, and please don't call, text, email, anything to say that you do.  we know you don't.  and if you've just started - I don't care, it can wait.

I'm going to meditate you out of my realm.  say adios, life slut.

I have been having beautiful sleep, waking up with a smile on my face...  It's very pleasant.

I wanted them to be gone and now they will be, one by one dropping off the edge of my thoughts in to the safe arms of Jesus's jaws to deal with.  He offers free services in getting rid of people you know.  Which is better than getting a hired mob to do it!

Rock On, Jesus! 361 til next year and counting!  :)

1. Water - Do not waste it

2. Fire - Do not stamp on burning fire to extinguish it

3. Moon - Pray to Lord for the natural coolness and peace

4. Sun - Worship for the heat and energy driven

5. Air - Avoid polluting the natural freshness of Air.

well, I tried to follow BigBlog's instructions to use my blog's graphic content more efficiently but no, I got nowhere, and it is still shitty looking - can't you see????

Then, I again thought I'd just roll on with the posting anyway, but realised I had no new material on the pute.  It's all written down - millions of pieces of paper... gotta type it up or scan it?

and you say - oh the poor trees.  email and computer much better...

well - I was alive at the time the internet came out.  it knocked down lots of trees in its growth in the physical attributes necessary to use it.  and then there was foxtel doing the same thing.  They cut down a huge flame tree I had at my old place, before I'd been asked, and while I was sleeping - or I'd have chained myself to it.  how rude of them!

some of the paper I have to use is older than me - and guess what? it still works!!!

????  huh ????

that's also an issue - I recycle my paper AFTER I've used every bit of it, remade it in to other paper, used every bit of that, then into the recycling bin to be picked up once a month.  (Although there are more pick-ups offered, I only need one per month, and once every two or three months of my regular trash bin)  If I have excess, I keep it or the crap bits go into the recycling.  Life is more colourful this way and you won't know why until you try it, no matter how much I say about it.

and I read somewhere (correct me if I'm wrong) that it is forseeable that MORE internet cables and dishes will be added to our earth soon, because the amount of crap on the internet is getting too much.  this was one of the reasons I deleted my 300?G site, and also I was looking for a good way to save some cash, as BigPond charge for the use of blogs over 10?G in size.  IT was not because I was embarrassed about what I wrote.  I hope there are heaps of printed copies of my work out there.... or even just one....

I wonder how much paper work was used to create the fucking internet?

and how much good storing all the info on it when there is no more electrical power?

people are forgetting how to write.

do you think the bloke you met on a chat page you will have a chance in hell of seeing again if you only have his email addy?  hackers aside, knowing people's addresses are useful.

I still use paper that I got excess of when I was doing PES Art, in 1990.  Before that, My Dad had computer paper he'd bring home from work, as it was all to be scrapped.  That was a lovely thing the screeds of computer paper... all the holes down the edges and huge pages striped blue and paper colour, with Dot Matrix writings on it.  MuthaFuckinSexy Paper!

I can't begin to think what life would be like without paper, but I can think of what it would be like without the internet.  Because I've known that before.  and it wasn't bad.  actually, it was quite fun.

But that's just another story in the life of Belladonna Princess, in her writings of Unleash the Dragon, of which I feel sorry for you if you are reading this for amusement.  shit you lead a boring life - get out there!  get your guernsey on and play ball!

seeya when ya legs are straighter....

pic used without permission.

Watch for These Signs of Potential Chronic Stress

Emotional

anxiety, worry, guilt
irritability, anger, frustration
depression
loneliness
disorganization, confusion, distraction

Physical

headaches; muscle, neck, back tension or pain
constipation
insomnia
heartburn, stomach problems, nausea weight gain or loss
skin problems
loss of libido

inability to complete conjugation

nb. this is not me - I have blonde hair and a Labrador